Thank You!!!
Wow. We are absolutely astounded and appreciative of the outpouring of love and support that you all have expressed in response to our news that we’re having a baby. Honestly, we didn’t know what to expect in response and were quite apprehensive about sharing our story.
About one thousand of you have responded to the post and many others have sent private messages. A lot of these are deeply personal, with journeys that differ in detail but generally ‘rhyme’ with our experience. We’re humbled by the joy and happiness you’ve shared for and with us, and incredibly thankful for all of you wonderful readers. We are also honored and grateful that so many of you have opened up about your own pain. We know that isn’t easy.
We’ve already spent hours–staying up late into the evening last night (by our current standards)–reading every single message that you all have posted or sent. All of them filled up our hearts; some of them filled our eyes. Your words got us choked up repeatedly, and we are so incredibly appreciative of your support. Whether a “congratulations” message or a personal story, it all means a lot to us. Again, we didn’t know what would happen when putting ourselves out there…but you all have easily exceeded our expectations.
As indicated in the announcement post, writing that was tremendously difficult as we tried to thread the needle on over and under-sharing, while also trying to be mindful about others’ sensitivities and scars, and not inviting more pain in the process. While some entire paragraphs flowed to us with ease and were done in a matter of minutes–words we always knew we wanted to write–we struggled with some single sentences for hours.
We had been working on that post since the day after our first doctor’s appointment and, as recently as last week, threw out an entire draft (minus a Dino-Rama joke; those never miss!) that would’ve ended up being longer than the published piece. It probably goes without saying, but the portion about infertility struggles was the tough part to tackle. That originally included more detail about the actual process and a lengthy rant about fertility clinics’ using emotionally manipulative tactics and spurious statistics. (Google “fertility clinics exploitation” for a small samping of eye-opening articles on the topic.)
For those who haven’t struggled with infertility, it would have come across as bitter. For those who have struggled, the missing words can easily be filled in with your lived experiences. If you know, you know. In any case, writing it out–even if throwing it away–was cathartic and perhaps brought some semblance of closure. It was also the right call given that we’re sharing happy and not angry news!
Suffice to say, we stressed greatly over what to share and what to leave out. Beyond our own pain, we didn’t want to imply that having children is the only means of achieving fulfillment, and those who walk other paths in life–whether by choice or involuntarily–are somehow lesser than or without purpose. That’s pervasive (even if often implicit) sentiment, but we certainly do not believe it. Nevertheless, it took us years of grappling with exactly those ideas before we had finally started coming to terms with being a childless couple late last year.
We also didn’t want to cause anyone else to revisit unpleasant memories or be callous towards those who are still struggling. As more than a few readers noted in the comments, this type of announcement is itself painful to read for many, and those complicated and conflicted emotions can be hard to understand if you’ve never been through it.
The sentiment to “never give up hope” starts to ring hollow after so many years of trying. How much heartbreak are two people supposed to endure while still retaining optimism? Words of encouragement are easy for those who haven’t struggled, or who have ‘successfully’ come through the other side.
The point is that we wrestled with what to say and what to leave out, finding excuses to kick the can down the road on sharing the news. Sharing the good news! We braced ourselves for possible judgment or negative reactions. One day later, reading all of the actual, unequivocally supportive and gracious comments…and those concerns seem laughably silly now.
We were instead greeted with an outpouring of comfort, support, and kindness. Your own heartwrenching and heartwarming stories about going through infertility treatments that bear strikingly similarities to our struggles. You opened up and shared your own vulnerabilities, excitement, and joyousness for two people who you’ve “only” met online. Your words mean the world to us–probably far more than most of you will ever know. Thank you so, so much.
It is also worth emphasizing the intensity of the air quotes around “only” above. We started out the pregnancy announcement by calling you all part of the DTB family and concluded by saying how greatly we appreciate your support and readership. We mean that. Megatron is going to be so loved.
How we wish we could’ve heard some of your wisdom and experiences at our lowest points. It’s one thing to read about others’ journeys in online support groups and whatnot–it’s another entirely coming from people who know you.
Many of you seem to have surmised what we were going through, so maybe we should’ve said something before. Of course, hindsight is 20/20 and sharing this years ago would’ve been a different, half-written story with potentially different outcomes and responses.
Okay, enough of that. Let’s look forward a little. Not to Megatron’s arrival and that glorious first meeting with Figment, but in the more immediate future. As some of you already figured out, there’s already been a lot that Sarah has not been able to do in recent months. You can probably think back and fill in some blanks, such as why Tom is the only one in the TRON Lightcycle Run on-ride photos (looking like a very cool dude).
Now that the cat is out of the bag, we can switch up our approach. Obviously, there will still be significant limitations, with a decent amount of Tom-only stuff for the foreseeable future. But that’s nothing new, so if you haven’t already noticed in the last few months, you won’t see any change there. (Suffice to say, our divide and conquer approach to Early Entry is not going to happen anytime soon!)
On the plus side, no more clandestine visits to Disneyland. We now can spend more time in the parks and, as many of you suggested, work on “What to Expect (at Disney) When You’re Expecting” posts and strategy. And of course, more photos of us as we continue on this journey, which has already gone by so quickly. Oh and speaking of which, thanks for all the complimentary words about the maternity photos; those were also much appreciated!
We’ve also made notes of some of the books, strollers and other products for babies and children you’ve recommended, and have a lot of research and learning to do. (The Dwight Schrute stroller testing remark was not a joke–it’s a goal!) Beyond that, we have to catch up and keep up with all of the ongoing changes at Walt Disney World and Disneyland, which would be a herculean task in normal times given the volume of recent news. It has been especially challenging as we’ve juggled it with all of this and everything else.
(Above is our last character photo before learning the news–also technically one of our first maternity photos–with OG DCA Mickey & Minnie Mouse. Fitting, as we now embark upon our own new Disney California adventure!)
Ultimately, we just wanted to stop and share a very sincere and heartfelt thank you. We truly are fortunate to have the best and most thoughtful readers. That may seem like a trite platitude, but we really mean it. Spend any amount of time browsing the comments section here versus most other websites and you’ll see the contrast. There’s a reason why the first rule of the internet is never read the comments. Thankfully, that has never applied with you all.
We’ll be back with more updates as pregnancy continues and Megatron (or Baby Bricker, Disney Tourist Baby, etc.) comes into the world. In the meantime, we’ll return to your regularly scheduled programming about reservation modifications, minions, Mickey’s Very Merry Christmas Party, etc. Again, thank you all so, so much for your support and opening your arms and hearts to us. It really means a lot to us–more than you can probably imagine!
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YOUR THOUGHTS
Any additional thoughts you have in response to our pregnancy announcement? Disney planning and pregnancy posts you’d be interested in reading? (Again, we don’t know how much we’re going to feel comfortable putting ourselves and our child out there, so we’d greatly appreciate you granting us grace and patience as we find our footing and prepare to be parents!) Hearing your feedback is always appreciated, so please share your thoughts below in the comments!
Such amazing news! It’s very courageous and important to share your struggles with infertility. We are so afraid to share even when so many deal with the same issues. I was so lucky to have two daughters through IVF and have been taking them to Disney since they were in my belly! I can’t wait to read about your new experience’s!
The best advice our pediatrician gave us is don’t forget to schedule time, if only a few hours, as a couple. Happy parents make good parents.
Your blog has been such an amazing resource for our family over the years. My daughter is going to college this year and we have repeatedly used your site to help us plan our trips. We have been taking our daughter to Disney since she was 6 months old, multiple times a year, and it has been so fun to watch them grow through our Disney memories. I wish you all the best in this exciting new chapter experiencing all of the magic with your new addition!
Tom and Sarah, I am just so beyond thrilled for you both and Megatron (and my best wishes for Walter and Yossarian- they might not enjoy their new tiny human friend at first, but once he or she starts eating solid foods, they’ll get on board). I have been reading your blog for over ten years, and every time we’re talking about anything Disney planning related, “what did the Brickers say about it?” Is one of my husband’s first questions because he knows anyone with such positive opinions of Country Bear Jamboree has to be trustworthy. So although I don’t “know” you, I am just so happy. You two seem like such thoughtful, fun, caring people, and are going to be such great parents.
We have a five year old and an almost one year old, and watching them experience Disneyland has truly been magical. I am so excited to read your thoughts on going to the parks with kids! It’s funny how it changes your perceptions of some things- maybe I wouldn’t love Avengers Campus if it weren’t for the fact that Captain America waving at him from the Quinjet is one of my son’s core memories. So much to look forward to. Congratulations ❤️
Seeing the headline for your announcement post absolutely made my day. You are such a wonderful couple and you deserve every happiness in the world. I can’t wait to read about Disney Tourist Baby’s adventures 🙂
Congratulations!! Lucky Little Megatron! My personal feeling is that people who know they should be parents, should get to be parents. I am very sorry for all the trials you had to go through to get here. Best wishes for only smooth sailing ahead!!!
I love you and am optimistic for our future when people like you reproduce. I was just listening to a timely public radio broadcast that made me laugh out loud (as a nurse), and then your comment about planning — here on a comments-open forum — reminded me of you! I think you’d love Chiara Atik’s “Bump” performed by L.A. Theatre Works.
soundcloud.com/latheatreworks/bump-part-1
You guys are the best and have made so many people feel so good. You deserve to be made to feel good by those people.
YAY! So happy for both of you and really touched by your honest heartfelt posts as well as your willingness to share such a personal part of yourselves. You have been so helpful to my family with your vacation advice that I do indeed find myself overjoyed for you and look forward to seeing your family grow. Many many blessings to you!
Congratulations from a long time reader. Mourned with you and others at the loss of Josh, and am so so overjoyed to hear this news for you.
Congratulation! My wife and I also struggled with infertility for 5 years before having our little girl (now age 5, and we have a boy, age 3). Like you, my heart will always be sensitive and aware of those going through the same infertility journey. It’s a club you never want to be a part of, but one that forever shapes you. We had a similar experience with clinics. Nobody could tell us “why” we weren’t getting pregnant, just do x, y, z (and spend $$$$). Even offering IVF insurance for an extra $5k!! At the end of the day, and after 5 failed rounds of IUIs (no IVF), we discovered NaPro Technology, a catholic/pro-life approach to fertility. They treat infertility as a symptom of something else wrong in your body, not a disease. EXPANSIVE testing found a number of underlying issues with my wife that were easily addressed via medication and change of diet, plus surgery for endometriosis…. And by God’s grace, we got pregnant naturally the following month post-surgery. So thankful for NaPro. And so happy that you two will realize your dreams of becoming a parent. It’s truly one of life’s greatest gifts!
Biggest congratz!!! This is my fav disney blog and I recommend it to everyone at any chance I get!! I’m so excited for you and Megatron!!! I had my mythical unicorn baby in 2019 and took her with us to Disney World in jan 2020 before the world changed, and it was such a great trip. The cast members and characters really made it extra magical and I can’t wait for you to experience it all!! My lil monster may not remember her special moments with characters but I will.
Also seriously, the one thing NO ONE told me before having a child was how FUN they are. For real, kids are so super fun, i feel like i’ve never smiled or laughed this much before having a child. Yes there’s a lot of work but the fun truly surprised me. I hope Megatron is as much fun as my gremlin <3
Two extremely thoughtful and well written posts. Congratulations and looking forward to advice regarding what to expect while expecting at Disney!
I hope you have an easy pregnancy. As I said before, being a dad and a husband is my greatest joy.. Our boys are now 28, 26, 22, and 21 and while I love WDW trips with just my wife, the most memorable are with our adult kids. I know that you and Tom will love time at Disney resorts with your child. I personally hope you get a little Alice in Wonderland! Anyway, even though Tom is an introvert, I plan to say hello and wish you both the best in person if I ever spot you during our trips.
I just want you to know I cried in happiness for you yesterday, and waited until now to tell you how happy I am for you. We all have stories I see. Although ours took from ’77 to ’87 for us to have our miracle boy, and then under 2 years to have a surprise girl was amazing! As Disney adults we were unable to get to the parks with them. You will be able to raise them there. How magical is that! My husband passed and I finally retired. Because of your blog, and Be Our Guest, we finally got to go last year! You are both so cute, articulate, and fun. I have only been following you for a couple of years and I do not know you, but know you will be amazing parents to Megatron. I hope watch your family grow right here. Do please let us know where you are registered.
Yes please let us know about a registry!
I’m so happy for you both, what wonderful news. The thoughtfulness in which you shared your story is exactly why you are my favourite Disney blog and why your readers are as you describe here. You created a culture of reasoned and logical discourse, you are always thoughtful to other opinions and you are clearly kind and compassionate people. Your little Megatron is lucky to have you both as parents. I wish you luck with the newborn stage (I’m doing it again myself right now) and as you settle into parenthood and the new dynamic of your life as a family.
Congratulations! This is the first I’ve heard your news. I’ll be praying for a healthy pregnancy and safe delivery. Thank you for sharing!
So happy for you both! It took us more than 6 years to get our miracle daughter, and it was worth every tear and heartache once we got her. It’s cliche, but it completely changes your entire perspective on life. My dad said to us when our daughter Fiona was born that having a child is like having your heart walking along outside of your body. There are lots of tip and tricks that the parents among us can pass along about kids in Disney Parks, but I’ll just leave you with this one — bring a wide stroller (we used to rent the plastic double strollers and put a beach towel down for a comfortable bed for her). We would ride and see things until she got sleepy, I’d find a shady spot that was quiet and a little more private to nurse, and my husband would find something cold to drink and a snack. We’d hang out and talk and jiggle the buggy until she slept out her nap, and then off we’d go for another round of riding. It was magical seeing Disney World through her eyes — you will love that! Sending you lots of good wishes for a healthy and easy rest of the way forward, and lots of blessings for the years ahead for all three of you.
Again…congratulations! Just reading this makes me smile! We,too, dealt with infertility (such insensitive doctors!! grrr..), and a miscarriage after finally getting pregnant. But we did have our daughter…and I wanted to say that all the struggles of before will disappear when you first hold your little one!!❤ We’ll be praying for a smooth, healthy rest of your pregnancy…can’t wait to see baby pictures!!❤❤
Again just a huge congratulations to you both. I always buy a few of these for friends when they are expecting as they are the absolute best baby clothes ever. Add them to your list! https://www.amazon.com/Magnetic-Pajamas-Baby-Sleepwear-Fastener/dp/B09ZJ5VYBS/ref=mp_s_a_1_4?crid=2TCEQ3F1HQRXI&keywords=magnetic+baby+pajamas&qid=1684459509&sprefix=magnetic+bab%2Caps%2C129&sr=8-4